Circus Monster
by AlyxFyre
Summary: MODERN AU. "I am simply a circus minster... ripped away from all that I loved." Doll no longer remembers kindness or love. All that was burned away, along with her innocence. Doll, once the diva of the Noah's Ark Circus pleasure tent, has become the nothing more than the circus monster.


**A note about this. It's set in a modern AU, where the Noah's Ark Circus is a special 'pleasure circus'. Doll is… kind of OOC, since she went mad. Diamond is an OC. I do not own any of the other characters, however.**

I am a circus monster. That's all I've ever been, isn't it? Alone, abandoned for the pain they caused, ripped away from everything I ever wanted to love.

Ripped away from you.

"_Now, for our special act: Doll and Diamond!" The spotlight shines on us: two beautiful birds perched on a high-wire, hand in hand. You whisper soft words as we perform. Once I'm back on the ground, you take me to our tent and hold me as I shake. "It's all right, my Doll. I won't let them hurt you." _

_That was when I first loved you._

I look beautiful, roses twined into the soft brown braid pouring down my side, pale white skin implanted with tiny diamonds like falling tears. But underneath… all that is left is the empty-chested circus monster.

Once I remembered how to love you. We lay together in my tent. You traced my cheeks, painted verbal portraits of our future life together. We were the circus royalty, holding hands and sharing smiles.

"_Doll, Father took her away. She won't make it today." Joker didn't look at me, focusing on tracing the diamond shape under his right eye. _

"_What? Why would Father want Diamond?" I grabbed Joker's violet cloak, but he pulled free from my grasp. "Please, Joker. Why did Father want him?"_

_Joker pushed me away, jabbing into my soft stomach with his boot. "Shut up, worthless. Diamond probably left because she hates to hear you whine."_

_I curl into a ball, weeping onto the soft dirt until they scream at me to get up. _

Now as I swing above the crowd, I watch tears glittering as they fall. I stare at the audience, looking for your beautiful brown hair. You aren't here.

I'm not good enough for you. I rip into my scarred skin with my teeth, but the dull ache can't distract me from the pain in my heart.

We were happy together. Now I'm trapped in a nightmare, striving to hide behind the curtain of my hair. I can hear the customers of this Circus buzzing with excitement. They stare up at me swinging in my cage.

Slowly I am lowered. Joker pulls me out of my cage. I bite into his hand but he rips out a handful of my hair. I scream through my teeth and shakily stand, my legs weak from days of being curled in a child-sized birdcage.

Hungry eyes devour me through my clothes, watching the circus monster perform.

"_Hey, look! It's the freak!" Hands grope me as I walk through the town. "Hello, worthless. Where's that lovely little bird that's usually there to protect you?"_

_I try to run, to hide, but the hands find me. They always find me now that you're gone._

_Where are you now? Have you found another girl to warm our bed?_

_Are you giving her compliments while I slowly go mad?_

They have a new boy I can room with now, a cute one named Smile. But he's not you. He tries to take your place. They try to make me royalty.

But my mind seems to be gone. I'm no longer a Doll. I'm just a circus monster.

_I kneel as Father slaps my face, rings drawing fine lines of blood. With one hard slap, I slide across the floor. _

"_Worthless garbage. Do you want to end up with her?" he screams, pulling my throat so my face is nearly against his. _

_Her? Is it… Diamond?_

_I turn to look … and immediately choke out a sob. Her face is burnt away, her mind dissolved from pain. She holds her hands out, reaching for any warmth. Her beautiful eyes that reflected the sky are white and weeping._

_I tear into my face as they haul me away from the wreck that I once loved._

_I became a circus monster._

I weep bitterly as I am once again locked in my cage. I've grown too feral to be a good circus pet. I need you to keep me sane. Please, please, come back.

I need you.

I fall to my side, exposed to the masses. They run jagged nails up my stockings.

Joker jabs him thumb into my side. "Get up, worthless. Do something entertaining." I simply hide my face, try to hide my whole self.

_I watched as they stabbed a dagger into Diamond's pale throat and left her for dead. Her wailing screams filled my head for hours._

I've been hired by a tall woman. I know what she's come for. No longer am I given to those who would hold me, love me.

Not the circus monster.

I spit at her as she enters my cage, and she draws out a whip.

Soon my skin is laced with a thousand cuts. My cage is stained with crimson blood.

The once-white roses in my hair are used to sop up my blood as I lay moaning in scarlet puddles. The spectators around the cage laugh and shriek.

"Get up, you worthless circus monster."


End file.
